What I Miss

Day 12: What Do You Miss?

There are a million things I could list here... But I will never miss anything more than my sweet, beautiful mother. 

Happy Mother's Day to all of you beautiful mama's! I hope your day is full of love!

What do you miss?

Ten Words

Day 11: Sell Yourself in 10 Words or Less  

• artsy
• empathetic
• domestic
• ambitious
• thrifty
• witty
• culinarian
• attentive
• humble
• dependable

that was SUPER hard!

your turn!

So Embarrassing

Day 10: Most Embarrassing Moments. Spill.

oyyyyyyy veeeeeeyyyy, there are a milllllllion stories i could tell here. considering i dont get out much any more... (an upside to being a hermit) i dont have any recent stories.

let's go back to age 19.

most of the time i was inebriated at this age (gasp!), but surprisingly enough, in this story... i'm not.

i wasn't in a relationship at this time. just kind of playing the field. i had just stopped seeing a younger guy. he was so arrogant and annoying. he didnt even have a job, but tons of money that his parents just gave him, because he was in college. for my birthday, he even got me a really awesome dress from express ($$!!). like i said though, super young... and he was super annoying and immature. so... bye bye, boy.

i started seeing another guy, shortly after (i sound like a slut... whatev). for our first date, he took me to a Chiodos concert in Myrtle Beach (2 hour drive with a stranger? YES! wth was i thinking? sigghhhhh). so we get there and GUESS WHO THE FIRST PERSON I SEE IS?! the freaking young arrogant asshole that i had just stopped seeing. AND GUESS WHAT I WAS WEARING!?




^ the dress...

haha, the stupid dress that he got me. so awkward.. we just looked at each other and smiled. no convo. so on we go. we get closest to the stage without being on the floor because this is an emo band and people like to slam dance and mosh to it... that still makes me laugh.

this dress had pockets, which was what made this my favorite. i'm like will ferrel in talladega nights... i never know what to do with my hands. i'm so awkward.

so of course, my hands were in there.
mosh starts going.
someone bumps into me.
i cant get my hands out of my pockets.
hands go up.
ass out.
for all to see.
especially my date.
kill me now.

this wouldnt have been so bad... i mean, i had underwear on. it's just like a bathing suit, right?

only that wasnt the end of my embarrassing story.

at the end of the concert, all of the bands are at the door, selling their merch.
i go up to this one guy whos selling Devil Wears Prada merch.
i'm gushing about how much i love his band.
realize he's not even in the band.
he's just selling their stuff.
logical thing to do? walk away.
what do i do? keep talking.
why? WHO EFFING KNOWS!

whatever. i'm sure i'll top that one of these days. but i'll probably be too intoxicated to care.


time for you to SPILL!!

Special Moment

      Day 9: A moment in your day        



watching her go from "unimpressed" to "full blown joy"!

 

eat. sleep. poop. repeat.

 

the life!

A Little Advice

Day 8: A piece of advice you have for others.      



It starts off like this...  



Setting: Circa 2002. My high school days. At home.
Scene: Probably going on about something materialistic that I wanted or wondering out loud about a boy that I'm confused about... 

Me: "Mom, what do you think?"
[cue music]
Mom: (singing) "Que Sera, Sera. Whatever will be, will be. The future's not ours to see. Que Sera, Sera."  

... Thank you, Doris Day...  


Sometimes I forget to stop worrying about everything. I have a hard time when I dont know what's going to happen next. I get anxious. So... naturally, I went and had "Que Sera, Sera" tattooed on my arm.  


Well, if she's not here to sing it to me, SOMETHING has to remind me to calm my ass down.  

My Fears...

Day 7: The Thing(s) You're Most Afraid Of...



Isn't it funny how fearless you are when you're little? I mean, the biggest fear I had when I was younger was losing my mom in a grocery store and the dark... those were the days.


The older I got, the more fears I accumulated.

Roaches, heights, elevators, speaking in front of the class (super, super shy!), failing school, being dumped by a boyfriend... you get my drift. Fears, but nothing compared to the ones that I harbor now.

Being a mom has been the best gift I've ever been given. But it doesn't come without a cost. That cost.. is fear!

Right now, there hasn't been much to put this fear in motion because I'm always near my kids. I know who has them, I know who that person is, I know where my kids are. But, at some point, you have to let them go. They need to go to school, be with friends, go to college, go to party's. I mean, I'd be just fine strapping a leash on them and holding that thing tight until the day that I die! I don't think they would appreciate that very much, at all.

I laugh at how ignorant I was, even at 18. Why did I think I was invincible? Knowing how I was, I can only imagine my children will be the same way. They will be totally oblivious to all of the ugly out there, no matter how hard I try to convince them otherwise. I will be worrying every.single.second that they're out of my grasp. I want to ask how my parents weren't LITERALLY sick with worry every time that I walked out of the door, but I know the answer already. You Just Do It!



I've already had one of my biggest fears happen to me when I watched my mother die of breast cancer at 18. Of course, it turned my whole world upside down. But I cannot even BEGIN to imagine how that felt for my grandmother. To watch her only daughter slip away, and there wasn't a thing she could do about it. Unfathomable.

Watching how that all went down for over 5 years makes me TERRIFIED of cancer. (who isn't though, really?) In all actuality, I'm just afraid of dying in general. Which is really not a way to LIVE.

Try having this battle in your head daily.



So what are YOU afraid of?

"What Do You Do?"

If you couldn't answer with your job, how would you answer the question "what do you do"?

Well, considering my job is a Stay At Home Mom, it'd be kind of tough not to say exactly that.

  Stay At Home Mom includes but is NOT limited to:

• very, very little sleep (especially with a newborn)
• half a pot of coffee in the mornings (dont judge me... if you also drink a gallon of coffee a day, heyyy!! let's be friends!)
• cartoons... and knowing all of the theme songs (and singing them when your child is nowhere to be found... stupid Strawberry Shortcake).
• coloring, blowing bubbles, playing outside
• weekly field-trips so that none of us go stir-crazy! (mostly me).
• take a gazillion pictures throughout the day. it's normal to have over a thousand pictures in your iphone. true?
• kissing boo-boo's and re-filling endless amounts of juice!
• reading half of a chapter of a REALLY good book. i'll finish it one day... maybe.
• fitting in any sort of exercise during naptime. unless it's the treadmill... it literally sounds like a train is coming through my house. do they make a quiet one of those? please share.
• washing the same load of laundry at least twice because it sits in there so long, it stinks.
• throwing said load of laundry on the bed and calling it a day after it's dried. who has time to fold and hang?! pfffttt....
• kiss husband hello and share SAHM duties until bedtime.
• maaaaaaybe get that pile of dirty dishes cleaned before bed (probably not)
• read bedtimes stories and give a millllion kisses and hugs before turning out the lights
• coming back to spray febreez Monster Spray all over the entire room to protect the little ones.
• snuggle with the husband and watch some shows you DVR'd.
• go to sleep and know that I wouldnt *ever* change a single thing. these days are long and the years are short. there's no better thing for me to do, than raise my girls and watch them grow every day.

What do YOU do?